a memorial day, a first and a last

it was agape's committee meeting day plus an outing


it was the best camp and time of my life..

there were only 13ppl who attended...
4 teachers and 9 committee...

im sure everyone of us had brought back something that we all hope for and we grow together in these 3days2 night

first day.. we were having fun and it's a relax day for us.

the pictures might explain a lil.. =)

my lovely Xiao En

this is when we got out.. lol..

sharon =)
she's also one of my fav =D


At evening..
two ridiculous boys playing.. training bumping
basically.. they are doing stupid stuff..lol..
looked like koala bear lol..
dao yi just have to follow -.-



At night..

game time!!
lol.. shi yang
dao yi


that night we all sat in darkness with two candles was placed in the middle..

it was an emotional moment for all of us.. the conversation started and we finally see each other tears as the time passed by..

we all saw our struggle..
our hurt...
our loneliness..
etc...

sometimes... we, humans might think that leaving something aside is the best way to keep things maintain.. but.. it only make things between the both of you more complicated.


sometimes... even a small lil thing.. if you never step up and just sit there, let it be.. it can grow into something big..or in the end, people might get hurt...


everyone chatted,
everyone had the chance to voice out..
the sharing ended bout 3am+

The Second Day..

we started our day with worshiping and meeting for 6hours. while the teachers were in another room having meeting among themselves too.. too be honest, can seriously die man.. and my backbone hurts. LoL.. almost patah ><

The evening..
[while waiting for everyone to done with our bath)
playing who's more flexible.. DaRn..><

yien fang a lil sot sot d.. she just started dancing
while the rest of us just dance crazily with the beat.lol..
maybe bcoz having meeting for too long til everyone gone a lil crazy

soon.. everyone's done.. while waiting..

he just love the candle. lol..
hmm.. wat is he doing?
answer:: his covering up the wax candle that been poured out accidently
pratising for worshipping..

At night...
(the second night)

we played some game and seriously i almost broke my arm and ankle -.-

there were two games.

1:: aggressive
2:: smooth.

First game..
groupB
groupA :: attack!!!!!!!!!!

trust me.. can die man. ><


Second game..

well.. as i've mention.. it's smooth.. it goes like this...


You have to walk up to every single person and chat for 5mins. tat 5mins is just between YOU and that person. watever thing you wanna tell him/her.


We started with groupB's member approach groupA's member........
later on, groupA will approach their own member once at a time.
same way goes to groupB...


im sure.. from there everyone of us had seen something that is in us that we cant see ourselve..
Gifts that has always had been there but we dun see it but others did..and we finally found out from each other's mouth..

............and there is when we give thanks to God =)

i was afraid of approaching You.. but you are the last person and my last stop..
i have no choice ><


i sat down..
180degree from each other....
half step away from each other..
you looked at me with that stern face.
your eyes into mine..
I know wat you expect..
I couldnt help but look away and outside the window which is beside you..
I couldnt return back your glance...
I have no guts to look into your eyes..


2minutes had passed...
silence fall between us....
we have nothing to talk.....
I can hear laughter from every corner bcoz there's another two ppl behind us, back at another ended corner.. plus our place is at the living room.. everyone would have pass by after 5mins..

we knew there's so much to talk bout..
but our mouths were sealed.

at last,
I turn back and stare back at your face...
I looked deeply into your eyes..
you do too..
stil waiting...
wanting you to start, but from those eyes..
I already knew wat's the next step..
so i started.


I have nothing and my brain is blank...
You looked at me...
without a blink....
and said the same thing back too...


both of us...
none of us move...
none of us talk........
but soon...


certain stuff were being throw out..
Soon, we started tearing as i continue to talk..


I know your heart is fragile... so is mine too...
we once can be so close and inseparable like no other ppl..
but now.. we felt just so so far away and strange....
is like.. we never were ever friends before.

Maybe because you're a GUY and im a GIRL..

We're young..
We're scared...
We fear....................
We're confuse.....
We were going through..
We are tired...
We're exhausted..
We're still searching...

We know our stand clearly..

but at times..

satan can get in our way anytime..

we hug each other..


i started to make noise as i choked in my tears..
and im sure i've wet your shoulder..


you tears too..
we pull each other close and hugged more tightly..
you put one of your palm on my head and hugged me more tightly as you heard me cried like hell..
our hearts were fragile and broken at the same time..
not wanting to let go..
you know that you've hurt both three of us..
and you wanted to give up..
but i told you not too..


of course those who are near us saw..
i know we weren't suppose to hug or have any physical contact since we're the opposite sex..
but im sure those who saw..
they wouldnt say anything for this time..
bcoz.. they've know or even seen that we both were in deep pain..


all of them couldnt even figure out and know wat had happen between us...
because it's just real strange that we were separate..
everyone saw.....
including our parents..
all the church brothers and sisters...
even the children whom were close to us...
they started asking..
but i turn away...

A last friendship..
A lost friendship...
Losing someone that you love dearly(as a friend of course)
A friend that is worth to remember..

Not knowing when would you and i learn..
Not knowing when are you going to open up your heart once again..
Not knowing whether all this is just a misunderstanding..
Not knowing is this in all God's grace and plan..
Not knowing wat would happen next....
Not knowing will your fragile heart will ever heal after so many stuff that you've been through..


After all we had been through in our lifes...
We were just too young for experiencing too much pain that is going through in our lifes..
But God said that he will be with us as we step on every thrones..
He will give us abundant life....


His hand is always there..
Angels will be guarding us..
By the end of the day, it would become a blessing...


Happy because of knowing you..
Happy because we had once a memory to be remembered..
Happy because you had gain my trust like no others did........
Happy because you had appreciate me like one of your sister in Christ and a close friend...
Happy because being the first girl that you trusted most..
Happy because you've opened up to me... letting me knowing bout you...
Happy because you've tear in front of me..
Happy because we were once crazy like.. undescribable..


Time is so precious..
Time is so rushing.....
Time is like a killer.....


It's a beginning of a new life...
A beginning of a new year.......
A beginning of a new start........
A beginning of a new friendship..

All these at once,
at the same time..
we grow more stronger...

I'm leaving soon, not sure when would be your turn...
Watching you lying comfortably on the bed that night...

Knowing all the sorrows in you that no one would understand just made me wanna be there for you just like you've been there for me..


But sadly..
I cant.
you wouldnt reveal..
not to anyone, including your family..
We cant..
Because we are not the same..
You're a BOY and im a GIRL..
Afraid that one of us might fall, or even both at the same time..
that's not the main point but.....
IT'S COMPLICATED...

You are strong and dominant..
I'm emotional and treasure every moments like some ppl said..

Dunno how long we will still be seeing each other..
Dunno how long this will last..

But i only hope for the best of it..

this is something that i gave you..

it's been a while since i last draw but that day, sunday shol teacher asked us draw ourselve and jot down all the stuff that each of us had done this year..

simply, i draw and started to jot down one thing to another...
when im done..
i thought of throwing into the dustbin..
and soon... you came into my mind..
the first thing...

I wanted you to have this pic..
Remember me as i was once your close friend..

What is the purpose of friendship?
Many left, seldom stay..
Many lost, seldom found..

We once feel so close,
suddenly feel so far.

Why?

we ended our conversation and you said we'll talk bout it later that night..
We hugged once again and i left..
Leaving you behind..

Teacher started to ask..
but i said im okay and smile and off to the next stop..


I'm not looking forward to start any relationship..
But i just wan to treasure this friendship....
If it's God will..
I'm sure when the right time comes..
We will know..
He knows wat is best for both of us...
He ald planned our path and lifes........

like i've used to tell you..
no matter wat..
You're always a precious corner to me..
in my heart..

***=********=*********=**********=********=********=********=*******=******=******


that night..

obviously the girls, most of them cant tahan d and they slept early while i was chatting with the guys. few of them were playing pokers and soon.. all of them doze off bout 5am..


as they slept.. i was sitting at one of the chair writing down some stuff.. bout 6.30am.. i return to my room but two of my roommates had stolen my bed -.- lol.. so have to bare wit it and i walked out and slept on the chair.. but well..


it's a great day.. and i would hold it dearly in my heart til my last breathe

=D
sleeping.. LoL

~GraceKoh~

Love and comfort on Christmas

start the day with a busy day..

having fun.. and.. the day ended, surrounded by comfort and love as i doze off into my dreamland..


you came up to me and did a thing that i've never hope nor ever think of.. bcoz i just knew how determine you are and you have a strong character that is so unique that i admire so much..
that is why you gain my trust like no other did..


you would never ever hug anyone or would dare to touch anyone.. neither express your feelings to anyone including your family.. but on that day...you did it..




i watch you leave...
like a leave been blew away flawlessly by the wind..
and soon..
tears started to drill down...


tears of comfort.....
tears of joy................
tears of appreciation...
tears of being happy......
tears of knowing that you never ever forget bout me..
i wanted to let you know.......
wan to babble to you so much....


but with that hug....
everything between us..
between the three of us...
the misunderstand , ice and left out...
all melt away at once with just one HUG.....


before i even finish my sentence..
you've cover me up with your hug...


a hug that once i felt and doubt that there will be a next..
a hug that is so precious...
a hug that is so rare....
a hug that is so comfortable...
a hug that explain itself..
a hug that explain everything..
a hug of apology...
a hug that dun wan to be forget...
a hug that tells you.. let's just precious all the time we had now before we separate..
a hug that no one would ever understand but.. amazingly.. i do.. im sure including you too..


you have seen me tear everytime..
lol..
it was funny..
somehow whenever i was in trouble.. you are always there..
no matter late at night, in my room and more..
you were ALWAYS there..


but you never call me a cry baby...
you sat there and listen..
be there...
but you did said one thing that made me laugh my head out.. which is....

" why whenever you saw me you always cry wan? i really that "cham" til i make you cry meh? my face really that sad til make you cry meh?"

lol..

you've taught me so much...
open my eyes...
but im stil to stubborn to do my decision even tho i know wat you said it's true...
but well.. we'll stil have 3days and 2nights together for the coming day..
hopefully things will get better...

=)

~GraceKoh~

yup.. that's me =D

Drama

the cutest lil brother. LoL

pastor yu is praying..
crowded

Merry Christmas!!!
=D

~GraceKoh~