Return Trip

Ever in your life, you KNOW that you're always
Running..
Hiding...
Skipping...
Bumming...


Always hoping things will get better and better as each day passes.
But it only got worse when you're all alone and bumming into stuff which are unexpected.

Whatever age we are, we can all think of a time when we wanted to be sure of something.

A time when things are really true to us.
A time when things can last...
A time with no doubts but trust...
A time to settle down and be true..
A time when things will never end...
A time when there's no more playing and hurting each other again..

Life is like a highway...

You can speed as fast as you wan when you felt frustrated...
Or even stop by to see some beautiful scenery along the way...
You can see many different kinds of scenery as you drive down the long highway..

Some may be pleasant and beautiful,
Some may be heartbreaking and anger.

Certain people knows what road they're taking..
But most, they just keep on driving down the road with no direction.


It's true..
Somehow things will come to an end, so does the highway.



Ever since the beginning, we knew things were getting awkward..
Til i finally left..
When i got back...
Things got worst and soon, it all became silence, like an ocean without living creatures in it.

Dead,
Lifeless,
No movement,
and all things were hid underneath the surface.

In a blink of an eye...
A year passed by...


I left again, and this time, no turning back.
I drive down the highway with a fragile heart..
Speeding...
Not wanting to turn back and have a second look at it....
Even tho deep down, i know this is the place where i belong..
I knew..

SOMEDAY..
SOMETIME..
SOMEHOW..

I would have to take a U-turn from this highway that im driving down now...
Until you said you regret......


My mind is spinning.
You're leaving soon...
I knew that all along...

Time is running out...

What am i suppose to do?
Turn back and forget everything and face the awkwardness again?
I couldn't even remember how you even look like anymore~!!!
Just a blurry image that i couldn't even remember even tho i tried to flashback my memories..



Gradually, i began to lost myself on the highway..
Feeling all alone and locking myself up.
Thought that i could find new friendships to build up and grow together to cover up that pain..


Until, I bummed into a friend.
I thought i was doing it right?
I thought..

"hey..hmmm..maybe this friendship will work out? why not give it a try?"

And there it goes...
But.... i was wrong.
I didnt know what else to do..
Was it all a lie?
It was obvious enough that the answer is "YES"
I got knock down in the end, hard.
Im just trying to be a good friend and be there for them when they really need someone.
And all i ever get...
Is just a shoots and bullshit crap..
Not even a single "thank you" LoL..


Not to deny that i was broken....


Until one day, i read a versus in the bible.. it said:

"Remember, I will be with you and protect you wherever you go, and I will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have done all that I have promised you."
~Genesis28:15~

Recalling another versus when Jesus was hung on the cross.. He used to say :

"Forgive them Father, for they do not know what they're doing"

It really warm me up.. more or less.
On the second day, a sister in Christ told me that it's all bout humbling yourself down.
People makes mistakes..
Things happen and that's why we learn from there and grow instead of blaming others.



So, finally.
Things were getting back to path.
I made my final decision by taking a U-turn from that highway..
Im coming back to a place where i knew what's best for me..
Im not gonna drive down on highways that i know that in the end i'll find nothing but loneliness..


Few days later, i found another few friends.
I doubt..
I struggle...
Not knowing how will it turn out again?
But.. why not give it another try?
Life is always bout learning?
Wasn't it? =)

Sometimes, we dun know what we have until when it is gone..

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So dear readers, (if you're ever reading this til the last that is)


Here's a few questions for you and me to think bout.. =)


Do we ever live for the moment and have eyes only for what is attracting us?
Do we ever take advantage of others?
What scale do we use to make our decisions?
Because sometimes, out of our realization, we hurt others in some ways when we did those decisions.
Sometimes, we even hurt them and we blame them at the same time.



How focus are you on some pain from the past?
The pain may not only still pierce your heart but also lead you to wonder if you'll ever see a day without it. No?
Im sure more or less.. some of us been through it and the taste wasnt pleasant =)


So.. if you wan how others to treat you, you should start by treating others too =)


Think bout it, alright? =)



Great days ahead ppl..

Cheers~!!!





~GraceKoh~